We spend January 1 walking through our lives, room by room, drawing up a list of work to be done, cracks to be patched. Maybe this year, to balance the list, we ought to walk through the rooms of our lives…not looking for flaws, but for potential.
Ellen Goodman
The most important thing to remember is this: To be ready at any moment to give up what you are for what you might become.
W.E.B. Du Bois
“I am not in this world to live up to other people’s expectations, nor do I feel that the world must live up to mine.”
Fritz Perls
This will blow your mind in regards to the power (and limits) of focus.
Seeing is not believing. We see what we believe
[via seth]
Gratefulness is the key to a happy life that we hold in our hands, because if we are not grateful, then no matter how much we have we will not be happy — because we will always want to have something else or something more.
–Brother David Steindl-Rast
During my morning and evening walks I am listening to a success classic called “Think and Grow Rich”. It was first published in 1937 after N. Hill interviewed over 25,000 business professionals over 20 years.
Some of it is dated. Some of it is funny, how some things never change. Most of it is very insightful. (The full book can be downloaded for free.)
Here is a part of a chapter I listened to this morning (minus the description of each cause). I don’t agree with all of it, but it is thought provoking.
THE THIRTY MAJOR CAUSES OF FAILURE
1. Unfavorable hereditary background
2. Lack of a well-defined purpose in life.
3. Lack of ambition to aim above mediocrity
4. Insufficient education
5. Lack of self-discipline
6. Ill health
7. Unfavorable environmental influences during childhood
8. Procrastination
9. Lack of persistence
10. Negative personality
11. Lack of controlled sexual urge
12. Uncontrolled desire of “something for nothing”
13. Lack of a well-defined power of decision
14. One or more of the six basic fears (poverty, criticism, ill health, lose of love of someone, old age, and death)
15. Wrong selection of mate in marriage
16. Over-caution
17. Wrong selection of associates in business
18. Superstition and prejudice
19. Wrong selection of a vocation
20. Lack of concentration of effort
21. The habit of indiscriminate spending
22. Lack of enthusiasm
23. Intolerance
24. Intemperance
25. Inability to cooperate with others
26. Possession of power that was not acquired through self effort
27. Intentional dishonesty
28. Egotism and vanity
29. Guessing instead of thinking
30. Lack of capital
“Millions long for immortality who don’t know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.”
-Susan Ertz, Anger in the Sky
Last night, when I took my evening walk, I was listening to a chapter of a classic book with the goal to continue to stoke the flame of dream.
In doing so, I was given two or three pieces of inspiration. Tasks that I could do to get myself closer to that dream.
As time has passed, I have come to believe that not only do we receive divinely inspired inspiration, but we receive that inspiration at the time we are to act on it. We don’t get inspired to today for something to do next Tuesday, later today, or in five minutes.
We have received the inspiration right now for a reason.
When I walked in the front door, I grabbed a scrap of paper to write the new ideas down before they quickly left my sieve like mind. Then got to work.
The first task was to ask for some help from someone I have never met, but have only seen speak.
In the e-mail I explained
* How I knew of him
* Who I was
* What my dream was
* Why it was my dream
* The obstacles to that dream (as I see them)
* How he could help
This morning, as I was talking my morning walk to the market to get fresh fruit, I was listening to the next chapter of the same book. The chapter was on desire. As I was listening, a line from the note I had written came back my mind.
I wrote, “My goal is to achieve X. (But if I only get half of that, it will be really great.)”
The second part of that statement is true, but I realized I have already started talking myself out of the goal. For some reason, there is a part of me that thinks the goal is too big, unreachable, or that I am not worthy of that goal.
There is a part of me that doesn’t think it is possible, so it is trying to talk me out of it, to save me for the pain of FAILING to reach that goal.
If I let that this voice win, then I am going to act tentatively. I am not going make the choice I need to reach my goal. I am going to insure my failure.
The blessing of this morning: That I realized I must be vigilant against my own thoughts in order to reach my goal.
[other thoughts and blessings]
I spent the weekend with like minded people.
I attend over twenty hours of classes in three days.
I learned a great deal.
Through out the weekend my mind was flooded with opportunities and possibilities.
In the front cover of my notebook I had two lists. One was todo/new ideas, the other articles and blogs to write. Both lists ended with more than 20 tasks on them.
Then the drive home happened.
It took about 9 hours to drive 350 miles home (because of little things I like to call CT and NYC).
Somewhere in Connecticut I could feel my dreams deflating. The sense of lightness of opportunity and hope was just gone. It wasn’t as quick as a balloon popping, but it also wasn’t a slow deflating. In less than 90 it was gone.
And it left me feeling empty. Kind of like a crash after a sugar rush. The low was a low as the high was high.
On Monday I was able to re-stoke the flame and get some work done on these new ideas.
Tuesday was a wash because of dental issues (and my wallowing in my dental issues).
Today, I am almost afraid to get up from my desk and eat breakfast, because I am going to break the momentum of the morning (which has been great filled with a few more new ideas and some good content).
Dreams are great, but they are not enough.
There is still the small voice inside of us that wants to talk us out of chasing dreams. It does not do this because it is mean or takes joy is sucking our’s. It is doing it because it is trying to protect us from the unknown and failure.
The little voice in our head that says, “can’t” and “not worthy” is a coward. It assumes the worst. It assumes you are going to get your hopes up and fail. It assumes that failure is going to be so painful it is going to cause death (or something much worse).
It is just trying to protect us from ourselves. Unfortunately, it is greatly misinformed.
I am not going to die if I fail, but I will suffocate if I don’t chase my dreams.
To do this I must keep stoking the fire of the dream. I must try again (and again). I must get up and dust myself off after setbacks. I must keep reminding myself that failure is not the end of the world (not matter how if feels in the moment). I must keep reminding myself of the past joys of chasing these dreams.
Even if I never reach these dream, by chasing them I will feel whole, alive and real.